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1. My order for parenting time states I will have "reasonable" parenting time. What does this mean?

An order that grants "reasonable" parenting time allows you and the other parent to negotiate a parenting time schedule that is convenient for both of you. Parents may agree to almost any schedule that is consistent with the best interests of each child and the overall family situation.

If you and the other parent cannot agree on a "reasonable" schedule of parenting time, you have the following options:
- Ask the other parent to agree to attend a joint meeting with the friend of the court, to participate in mediation, or to seek counseling, (either with you or separately). With help from one of those neutral parties, you and the other parent may be able to agree on a parenting time schedule.
- File a motion on your own or contact an attorney.

2. My order lays out a specific parenting time schedule. I would like to change that schedule. What can I do?

First, ask the other parent to agree to a change. If you both agree, the proposed change and reasons for it may be presented to the court a proposed new court order. The judge almost always will sign an order that is based on the parents' agreement. Remember that the agreement by itself is not enforceable; it must first be converted into a new court order.

If the parents cannot agree on the changes, either may ask the friend of the court to mediate their negotiations. The friend of the court will provide mediation services if both parents agree to participate.

If no agreement is possible, you may file a motion asking the court to order a new parenting time schedule. You may file the motion on your own, or have an attorney file it for you.

3. The other parent is not making the child support payments required by our court order. Do I have to allow parenting time?

Yes. You must continue to obey the order's parenting time provisions. Ask the friend of the court to enforce the child support provisions.

4. The other parent is not sending or returning clothing or other personal items that our child uses during parenting time. Can the Friend of the Court do something about that?

The Friend of the Court can only enforce the court's written orders. If your court order does not say anything specific about transferring clothing or other personal items, try to work it out with the other parent. If that is unsuccessful, you may file a motion requesting a new court order that will require that clothing or other personal items be transferred along with you child before and after parenting time.

5. The other parent is not obeying the parenting time order. What can I do?

File a written complaint with the friend of the court within 56 days of the incident. The Friend of the Court has parenting time complaint forms available at the office and on our website.

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6. If I think that the other parent is under the influence of alcohol or drugs, do I have to let the children go with that other parent for scheduled parenting time?

This is your decision as a parent. If you violate the court order in such a situation, you may have to explain your decision to the court at a "show cause" hearing held to decide whether you should be held in contempt of court for disobeying the parenting time order. That will be your opportunity to explain why your decision was in the best interests of the children. If the judge agrees, you will not be held in contempt or otherwise punished.

7. The other parent will not let me telephone my children. What can the Friend of the Court do?

The Friend of the Court can only enforce the written orders of the court. If your court order does not provide for telephone calls, try to negotiate an agreement with the other parent. You may request friend of the court mediation or other methods of resolution. If that is unsuccessful, you may file a motion asking the court to modify the order's parenting time provisions to require that you be allowed to call your children.

8. I think that my child is being abused during parenting time spent with the other parent. What should I do?

Report your concerns to the Protective Services Unit of the Department of Human Services. The Friend of the Court office does not have the authority to investigate abuse or neglect allegations. Nor can it remove children from the home of a person who commits or allows mistreatment. Only Protective Services can take those actions.

9. My child does not want to spend time with the other parent. What can I do?

Parents must obey court orders regardless of the child's age and preferences. Each parent must try to promote a positive relationship between the child and the other parent. You may want to try the following:
- Work out a different arrangement with the other parent.
- Seek counseling for your child, yourself, and/or suggest that the other parent does the same.
- Contact the Friend of the Court and request mediation.
- File a motion asking the court to change your parenting time order.

10. The other parent refuses to see our children. What can the Friend of the Court do?

The Friend of the Court cannot force a parent to see his or her children. To promote a positive relationship with the children and the other parent, you may wish to consider counseling, mediation, or filing a motion the change the parenting time order.